Early November Musing

Recently, I’ve realised that many of my friendships are teaching me things about myself that I didn’t know before. The best friendships, I think, are the ones where you can be completely yourself — where you don’t have to fake anything or seek anyone’s validation. Because honestly, no one knows you better than you do. The only validation that truly matters is the one you give yourself.

I’ve also noticed that we tend to take a lot of other people’s actions personally — whether they’re from friends, teachers, parents, or partners. But sometimes, it’s not about us at all. What if the things people say or do are just reflections of who they are, or who they used to be, and not a judgment of who we are? Maybe it was never about us to begin with.

If something hurts us, it’s okay to feel that pain for a while — but what if, instead of asking “why me”, we tried to understand the reason it affects us? That shift in thought can help us let go of what doesn’t belong to us. And maybe that’s what self-awareness truly is — learning to understand our emotions without letting them control us.

I’ve come to believe that if you’re not happy with who you are, no one else can make you happy either. Happiness and healing are our own responsibilities. They come from within.

To my friends — I’m sorry if I’ve ever hurt you. I was just trying to be myself, even when I didn’t fully understand who that was. Sometimes, what hurts me reflects more about the other person than it does about me — and I can’t change that. But what I can change is my reaction to it, and that’s what will shape how our friendships grow.

From now on, I want to stop taking things too personally. If something said by my friend hurts me, I’ll allow myself to feel it — but I’ll also take a step back, detach from the words, and try to understand the intention behind them before I respond.

I want to become a better person — more emotionally intelligent, more understanding, and someone my friends can feel safe opening up to. I want to be a good friend to others, and an even better friend to myself.

-Harshita

9/11/2024